Thursday, 22 March 2012

How to sleep like a Cat

1. The Full Situp  To achieve the full situp, you must begin with the genuine intention of exercising your abs and promptly fall asleep midway through the task. This position is extremely advanced and not recommended for amateur sleepers.

2. The Awkward Spoon    The goal here is not so much intimacy as it is the socially uncomfortable sharing of a physical space with someone. Bonus points if your arm falls asleep but you're too embarrassed to move it.

3. The Semicircle   Tuck your tail between your legs and imagine that you are an omelet.

4. The Sunbather    The trick is to look like someone who is acting comfortable whilst also appearing extremely uncomfortable. Let's take this excellent opportunity to coin the term "ZZZmeta-comfortable."

 5. The Double Bed   You will need a partner for this one. The goal is not so much comfort as an expression of sheer, unadulterated greed.


 6. The Half-Box   Any old box will do, but two of your feet - preferably on opposite sides of your body - must remain outside the container at all times.

7. The Backstroker  Do not even attempt unless you have tiny, tiny, precious little legs.


 8. The Sleeping Baby  Find a baby. Imitate the baby.

9. The Fur Pile  For this, you will need at least three friends who are not averse to your sleeping on them.

10. The Full-Box  Just get your whole damn body in there no matter what it takes. Be the box.

11. The Drunken Radiator   Just because you are obviously some kind of gin-addled hobo doesn't mean you can't be nice and warm.

(I don't know whose photos these are - they were in one of those round-robin e-mails. There'll be another set of them soon.)


  1. Oh my fuzziness...these are adorable!! To be a cat, huh?! What a life.

  2. These photos - and no less the comments - are hilarious. I can hardly write for laughing. Thanks for sharing them!
    Take care, McGregor

  3. And here I was thinking what a fantastic photographer you are -- until about halfway through. Actually I received a set like these(different photos) but they are absolutely hilarious. I especially love the double bed one.

  4. A rather better-than-usual selection of round robin jokes and a very much better way to view them than via an email.

  5. Everyone who has or had a cat will have seen several of these positions at some stage :-) These pictures almost make me want to get another cat soon...

  6. Fantastic! So sweet.

    Polly had a sleeping position that we referred to as 'the head-plant' - face down and looking like she couldn't possibly still be breathing.

  7. Thank you for helping me start the day with a laugh.

  8. These are delightful. Every one a smile. Thanks for sharing, Scriptor! xox

  9. so funny, i do so love sleeping pets of any kind

  10. these are so wonderful - looking forward to seeing the rest

  11. These are so funny, especially the comments!


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