One-liners for those of us having a bad day....
You say I’m a bitch – like it’s a bad thing.
How many times do I have to flush before you go away?
Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
Don’t bother me. I’m living happily ever after.
Do I look like I’m a people person?
This isn’t an office – it’s HELL with fluorescent lighting.
I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.
YOU!!! Off my planet!
Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose!
Practise random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control.
Errors have been made. Others will be blamed...
I’m not crazy. I’ve just been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
Stress is when you wake up screaming and realise you haven’t gone to sleep yet.
This is a mean cruel world and I want my nappy and medication right now.
Earth is full. Go home.
Me, ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
Back off! You’re standing in my aura.
I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?
Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
Ah, did I step on your itty bitty ego?
Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
Chaos, panic and disorder. My work here is done.
Monday 23 August 2010
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Blog Archive
-
▼
2010
(294)
-
▼
August
(33)
- Icons of Englishness
- Happy Monday - Mary had a little lamb...
- Philip Stanhope, Lord Chesterfield
- Polythemus
- Friday My Town Shoot-out
- Three reasons never to be unhappy
- Think of a caption...
- Wednesday Wildlife - Broad-bodied Chaser
- Tuesday's Thoughts
- Gorleston, Nr. Great Yarmouth
- Happy Monday – One-liners
- Trivia Galore
- The Lotty Sleigh
- The War in the Vendée
- Wednesday Wildlife - Ichneumon Wasps
- Lilac-breasted Roller
- Happy Monday - Time for that old person's home?
- How would you like your hair cutting?
- Blogger goofed
- Florida
- Friday My Town - Shoot-out - Roads and pathways
- Manners makyth man
- Wednesday Wildlife - The Caribbean hermit crab
- Sheep Street, Chipping Campden
- Happy Monday - Grandma and Grandpa
- Alexander Beetle
- Pakistan
- Friday My Town Shoot-out - Smells
- A load of old chairs
- Wednesday Wildlife - Tiger Beetles
- Things Mum and Dad said...
- Happy Monday - For all my Women Readers...
- Some old photos
-
▼
August
(33)
Makes me think it's probably a good thing there is no one around to talk to!
ReplyDeleteThis is a very good post. Very funny. I like self-deprecating humor, so I may use the one that says, "Not all men are annoying. Some are dead."
ReplyDeleteEspecially at work where I'm the lone male teacher on campus. (And sometimes annoying... not always on purpose.)
LOL - what a great way to start a Monday...BTW, the final one about creating chaos & my work here is done? Perfect for my soon-to-be four year old nephew!!
ReplyDeleteCanadian Chickadee
PS - The word verification word I was given was "gaffeda" -- Is that a female giraffe?