Happy Monday

I have decided that those folk who are still obliged to work for their living deserve something to cheer them up on a Monday morning. So here is the first of a series of 'Happy Mondays'.

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, 'If GM (General Motors) had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.'

In response to Bill ' s comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics :


1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash.........Twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and re-open the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single 'This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation' warning light.

7. You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine off.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

(and I just love this one -)

10. The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying.



P.S. I haven't been able to trace the cartoonist so I haven't been able to ask permission to use it. If anyone knows I shall be more than happy to seek his or her permission.
 

It has taken over twenty years but

It has taken over twenty years but Partner-who-loves-tea has at last earned the right to use my surname. As I have mentioned before, our family – i.e. my parents and brother, my daughters and son – are noted for their punctuality. Partner-who-loves-tea is noted for her lack of punctuality. If I ask when she is going to be home it is with a lot more hope than anticipation of her being within an hour or two of the time stated. And the answer is usually pretty vague any way – usually along the lines of “About 7 or 8 – somewhere round there.” So imagine my surprise when this phone texting conversation took place the other day:-

Me at 11.14 a.m. – “Lost track of appts. When will u b home? J”

Jo’s reply at 11.19 a.m. – “About 1.22. Jo. x.”

And, what was even more unbelievable – she arrived a few minutes early!

Welcome to my world, Jo.

An Award

I have decided to give an award to my favourite blogging photographers. When I first started blogging and looking at Blogs it was the excellence of people’s photos that attracted me. Nowadays I am equally interested in the writing but every now and then a particular photo reminds me how many brilliantly talented amateurs there are out there.


The recipient is welcome to display it on their blog but is equally welcome not to do so. There is no passing on or writing deep secrets necessary. It is simply an acknowledgement from me of how much I have appreciated the person’s photographs.

I have decided to give the award to one person every Sunday until I run out of folk to give it to. So this is my first awarding of the Photographic Excellence Award.



And the first person is Jen of Jennifer Photography and My Moments. Jen hails from the USA.

I decided that each time I made the award I would direct readers to a particular photo that captured my attention. Gosh, I hadn’t anticipated how hard it would be to choose just one. In the end I chose this one for Jen but really I would simply recommend a trip back through Jennifer Photography to get an idea of the breadth and depth of her skill at finding subjects and capturing atmosphere. Thank you, Jen, for all the enjoyment you have given me.


 

Word Verification

Don’t you just love it when the Word Verification word on a comment is relevant to the comment? I was on Nan’s blog commenting on a recipe and what did I get...


(And yes, I did correct the spelling before hitting the send button!)



 

Beware, this could happen to you.

An elderly gent was invited to an old friend's home for dinner one evening. He was impressed by the way his buddy preceded every request to his wife with endearing terms such as: Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc. The couple had been married almost 70 years and, clearly, they were still very much in love.

While the wife was in the kitchen , the man leaned over to his
host, 'I think it's wonderful that, after all these years, you still call your wife those loving pet names'.

The old man hung his head. 'I have to tell you the truth,' he said, 'Her name slipped my mind about 10 years ago ,and I'm scared to death to ask the cranky old bitch what her name is.'




 

Friday My Town Shoot-out – the Incongruous

I think Mary’s idea of finding something incongruous was a great one. It’s just that I have really struggled to find anything. INCONGRUOUS is defined as: Out of place, ridiculous, inconsistent, contradictory.

My ideal would have been a drover taking a flock of sheep down Pensby Road with a queue of traffic stacked up behind him. Perhaps not surprisingly, I couldn’t see that happening nowadays.



In some places it snows a lot over the winter so this sort of thing may be commonplace but here in Pensby enough snow to make a snowball this size is a rarity. And certainly finding it in the road this February was rather incongruous.

If you would like to see more My Town Shoot-outs please visit the home blog.



 

St Augustine

28th August is the day of St Augustine of Hippo. St. Augustine was one of the most important figures in the development of Western Christianity. In Roman Catholicism, he is a saint and pre-eminent Doctor of the Church, and the patron of the Augustinian religious order. Born in Africa as the eldest son of Saint Monica, he was educated and baptized in Italy. His works—including The Confessions, which is often called the first Western autobiography—are still read around the world.

St Augustine framed the concepts of just war and original sin. Firstly, war must occur for a good and just purpose rather than for self-gain or as an exercise of power. Secondly, just war must be waged by a properly instituted authority such as the state. Thirdly, love must be a central motive even in the midst of violence. Original sin, according to Augustine, consists of the guilt of Adam which all human beings inherit. Born Aurelius Augustinus Hipponensis, he is the patron of the Augustinian religious order.


Why am I bothering to tell you all this? Because I think this quotation of his is one of the best I have come across recently:-

“Nobody can summon yesterday to return; today is being pressed by tomorrow to pass away. This is the very brief space of time in which we must live well, in order to go to that place from which there is no more passing away. And even as we are speaking, we are indeed passing away. Our words run onwards, the hours are flying by; so too our life, our deeds, our achievements, so too our suffering, and our very happiness. Everything passes away. “

The Treadmill

Even I am not old enough to recall the days when prisons had treadmills and those condemned to hard labour were required to walk on the treadmill for hours on end.


But I am old enough to find it hugely amusing that we now stick great big pieces of machinery in our lounges and spend hours walking on them. Usually, in the case of Son-who-watches-films, to the accompaniment of television viewing.


We recently bought one at an auction and the fact that there are so many of them in every auction – virtually brand new and going for an eighth of their shop price - suggests to me that the enthusiasm for using them does not last long. Notice how the arvertising pictures always show a trim young blonde happily enjoying herself on it. I suspect the majority of users are three times the weight and sweating like pigs but that would not be such a good sales pitch! Nevertheless, the treadmill is keeping Junior fit and out of mischief; so long may it continue. Partner-who-loves-tea also said she would use it but I’m not sure two short bursts in the first month count.

As for me, I dislike them intensely. I have to go on one every time I have my heart checked. It’s not the fact that I have to do it until I get my first angina attack that bothers me. It’s the fact that my neuropathy means I can’t feel my feet and have very poor balance. I am therefore forever falling off it! Now that would make a good blog photo! In the meantime, I'll stick to rambling on the Internet or walking down the road to the shops.

 

The dialogue continues

Perhaps it reflects the sex of the majority of my readers but I noted little sympathy for me over the good wife’s guide or when Jo and I had our piece of dialogue. Perhaps the sympathy will increase with this latest piece of chat from Jo which followed her claim that I owed her a BIG present. She came into the lounge and did a fashion show...

Jo:- “We went in Mooch, that new shop in West Kirby. It’s not a cheap shop, shall we say.”

Scriptor thinks:- “I presume that translates as ‘It’s damned expensive’?”

Jo:- “Any way I wasn’t really looking. I was just walking behind Val, basically.”

Scriptor thinks:- “Like, I’m expected to believe that?”

Jo, modeling a new, knee-length cardigan:- “What do you think?

Scriptor:- “I have to admit it would not be my choice.”

Jo:- “I didn’t really expect you to like it. It’s alright, you don’t have to like it – you just have to pay for it!


 

Baby Boys

A few more mementoes from the Scriptor Senex heirloom box...


A brass barrel money box which Jo and I decided to use for David. It still contains a couple of pounds which he was given as ‘pocket money’.


This duck money box was a christening gift to Richard from his Nana and Grandpa. Perhaps unsurprisingly it has no money in it.


This is the teether that Richard was given as a tiny tot. It wasn’t designed for use – merely as something to be kept.


This was attached to my teether and judging by the absence of the ring it was used!


These little people were on a bar that ran across the front of David’s high chair.


And this chap – about an inch long – was among the items that my Mum kept until her death. It looks like a cake decoration so I assume it was on a cake made to celebrate GB’s birth or christening – or possibly mine.

 

Some spoons

Having sorted thought the jewellery I undertook to show you one or two pieces but before I do I thought I would show you some of the other things I’ve been cataloguing. Today’s little show is family spoons:-


This is my grandmother’s Christening spoon. Her name was Florence Katrine Spencer and she was christened in 1877.


This is my Mum’s Christening spoon. She was christened in 1909.


This is my Christening spoon. I was christened in 1949.


This is a spoon from David’s first Christmas 1986. Sadly. he was not to live long enough to have a Christening spoon.


This is Richard’s christening spoon – a replica of an Edwardian one – from GB. Richard was christened in 1988.



This is a christening spoon given to Richard by his other Godfather, Paul.



This is Uncle Eric's christening spoon. Uncle Eric was Mum's brother and died childless so GB and I inherited his things.



These are just a couple of many spoons and forks that we have which are inscribed HFB being from Nana and Grandpa’s sets – the HFB stands for Henry and Flora Body. We use them on a day to day basis. Apparently Grandpa won a number of sets playing bowls at the Childwall Abbey pub.


This spoon is a cut above the average spoon that you buy in tourist places being heavier and larger. For as long as I can remember it ‘sat’ in one of Mum and Dad’s sugar bowls.



This spoon is from my Great Aunt Maude’s first marriage to Will Noble. Nana’s sister, born Annie Maude Spencer, she married William Thomas Noble in 1897. The spoon is hallmarked London 1896 and inscribed N for Noble.



This was a wedding gift to Mum from – the E representing her new surname – from a girl in the office. There was much of a guessing game about what the gift was to be and one of the clues was that the gift ‘sat’. It turned out that it ‘sat’ in a sugar bowl, being a sugar spoon.


Caddy spoon used on a day to day basis by Mum until tea bags became the norm. It is of foreign silver.



This spoon belonged to my Great Great Great Grandmother who was born Ann Gomm Young (1819-1916). Note the number 4 beneath the initials AGY suggesting it was one of a set of six and it was obviously a gift prior to 1822 when she married James Spencer and therefore changed her initials.


And a caddy spoon which is hallmarked 1810/1 – late George III. It was a wedding gift to William Lane and Caroline Hows upon their wedding in 1813 and is inscribed WC. They were my great, great, great grandparents. The spoon was passed on to my great grandmother, Louisa Sophia Lane (later known as “Grandma Spencer”) when she was an hour old on 29th August 1849. The idea being that it should be passed on through the eldest girl in the family. She in turn gave it to her eldest daughter, my great aunt Maude, who passed it to Mum. Mum gave it to me to keep safe for Bryony and it was passed on to her some years ago. So this little spoon has come down through six generations; long may it continue to do so.

 

Rubens

I doubt there is a more popular guy on the GP circuit than Rubens Barrichello. Some might find it surprising that his name is on my Brawn GP cap - rather then that of Button, their British driver. I do like Jensen Button but Rubens has been one of my favourite drivers since he first came to the circuit as a driver for Eddie Jordan.



Yesterday he won the European Grand Prix, taking it by a hair's breadth from Lewis Hamilton. I was delighted and judging by the way he was cheered down the pit lane a lot of the other teams were pleased at his win as well.


He dedicated the win to fellow Brazilian Massa who was severely injured a month ago in a qualifying accident at the last Grand Prix. Barrichello even wore a picture of Massa's helmet on his helmet.