Monday, 11 October 2010

Happy Monday - The Memory Man

A scouser (for my friends abroad that is someone from Liverpool!) is on holiday in Arizona USA. He's staying in a remote frontier type town and walks into a bar .

He orders his drink and sits down at the bar when he notices a native American Indian, dressed in full regalia, feathered head dress, tomahawk, spear, the lot, sitting in the corner under a sign saying 'Ask me anything'

The scouser is intrigued and asks the barman about him.

'Oh, we call him the memory man, He knows everything.' says the barman.

'What do you mean he knows everything?' asks the scouser.

'Well, he knows every fact there is to know and he never, ever forgets anything'

'Yeah right' says the scouser.

'If you don't believe me, try him out. Ask him anything, and he'll know the answer'

'Alright' says the Scouser and walks up to the Memory Man.

'Where am I from ?'

'Knotty Ash, Liverpool , England ' says the Red Indian. And he was right.

'Alright' says the scouser, 'that was easy you probably recognised my accent. Who won the 1965 FA Cup Final?'

' Liverpool ' says the memory man quick as a flash.

'Yes and who did they play?'

'Leeds United' again without blinking

'And the score?'

'2-1' says the memory man without hesitation.

'Pretty good, but I bet you don't know who scored the winning goal?'

'Ian St John' says the Indian in an instant.

Flabbergasted the tourist continues on his holiday and on his return to Liverpool tells all and sundry about the amazing Memory Man. He just can't get him out of his mind and so he vows to return and find him again and pay him his due respect .

He saves his dole money for years and finally twelve years later he has saved enough and returns to the states in search of the memory man.

He searches high and low for him. And after two weeks of trying virtually every bar and town in Arizona he finds him sitting in a cave in the mountains, older, greyer and more wrinkled than before but still resplendent in his warpaint and full regalia.

The scouser, duly humbled approaches him and decides to greet him in the traditional manner..


The memory man squints at the scouser.

'Flying header in the six yard box.'


  1. Briulliant. It made me laugh out loud at 0900. That's no mean achievement.g

  2. I hope you don't mind, I found your blog through a mutual blogger friend, (The librarian, Meks), and saw this post and just had to say, thank you for the laugh!! What a great post! :)


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